Maryn Says: 2020

The Introvert’s Guide to Happy Self-Isolation

I’ve joked online for years that I live like a hermit by choice, but it’s no laughing matter for the extroverts chafing under self-isolation, craving the social contacts they cannot safely enjoy. So here are some tips from a grizzled stay-at-home-all-day-every-day veteran.

TIME MANAGEMENT

Set an Alarm. Get up about the same time every day. You can get more sleep than usual, sleep until a later hour, but get up. Likewise, go to bed about the same time every night. Sufficient sleep is a luxury for lots of working people, but it’ll do you good, both physically and psychologically.

Schedule Activities. Have blocks of time set aside for certain activities each day. Why? Because it’s too easy to refresh social media, check your phone yet again, and otherwise spin your wheels, accomplishing nothing and not enjoying yourself, either. (Which would count as accomplishing something.) Mix up things you do for pleasure and things you do because they need to get done.

Block out Reading Time. Even if you’re not a reader, a well chosen book will transport you from the present world and its problems to someplace else. You do not need to read something challenging, although this is a fine time to do that if you feel like it. Reading strictly for pleasure and entertainment is the goal.

Schedule Food, Too. It’s easy for someone unaccustomed to being home all the time to eat all the time, and stress eating is real. So eat your usual meals, slate yourself some regular snack times, but don’t sit down to any activity and stop every half hour to eat something. When this is all over, you don’t want to emerge with a weight gain.

Pre-Arrange Time with Friends or Family. Maybe you meet for cocktails with your parents via Skype thirty minutes before you need to start dinner, or FaceTime over coffee with a friend mid-morning. “Seeing” someone every day for conversation has the power to normalize the way you’re living. You can pre-arrange to see someone daily, rotating among friends and family members. (Please help low-tech people if you can.)

Differentiate Weekdays from Weekends. It helps to have some semblance of the normal rhythms of ordinary life. Put different things on your weekend schedule than the weekday. Maybe dinner Friday night is take-out, or something a little fancy served with wine. Maybe it’s movies in the evening instead of series TV. Maybe you do something religious or spiritual. Maybe you make a pizza Saturday night. Whatever makes the feel of a weekend different is good.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

Dress Yourself. Uncertainty, depression, isolation—what’s the point of getting dressed when pajamas are so very comfortable? And who’s to know if you washed today or brushed your teeth? While comfort is important when you’re stressed, make yourself bathe and dress every day. It does good things for your state of mind, even if all you achieve is sweatpants and a T-shirt.

Use Your Body. Some of your scheduled activities should be physical motion. Whether you go for a walk or run in the deserted streets, change the sheets on all the beds, tackle yard work, take a yoga class online, or scrub the kitchen floor on hands and knees, being physical is good for your body and your mind. See if you can get a minimum of thirty minutes six days a week, mixing it up however you like.

Feed Your Body. Some stress eating and treats are okay, but not every day and not in large portions. While grocery stores struggle to maintain stock, buy and eat what’s available that’s essentially healthy.

Feed Your Inner Self. Do something solely because it brings you pleasure, peace, or comfort, daily if possible. Take a long soak in the tub. Meditate or pray. Pet your pet (hence the name, right?). Go for a drive. Have sex with your partner or solo. Sing or play an instrument.

Not Too Much. If you drink alcohol or use marijuana, don’t let yourself overindulge as a new way of daily living.

Soothe the Savage Breast, or Beast, Whichever You Have. Use music to set moods that match your needs. New Age and Classical allow you to do work that requires thought. The right kind of rock gives you energy for tasks. Other music makes a pleasant background for cooking, during a meal, or to listen to while you enjoy a stroll.

Breathe. There’s something different about fresh air. Open windows if it’s warm enough, airing out one room at a time. Better, get yourself outside regardless of the weather. You can walk or run, or simply sit in a chair in the yard or on a park bench, even if it requires a coat. Stroll a public park or hiking trail if social distance is possible for all. Don’t let temperature or precipitation be what stops you. A walk in the rain can be really calming.

TAKE CARE OF YOUR SPACE

Organize a Little at a Time. Your day’s schedule should often incorporate something that organizes your home. Clean the coat closet, the sock drawer, kitchen cabinets, under the bathroom sink. Throw away, set aside to donate, re-arrange for actual use.

Cleanliness is Next to… Something. Walking into a place that’s usually cluttered or dirty is very, very different than when it’s clean, free of dust, nothing out that shouldn’t be. Schedule cleaning right up there with organizing. Messes and clutter that seem too large to tackle can be dealt with in the time you suddenly have.

Fix It and Forget It. You have things you’re holding onto because they need a small repair, mending, the hem reattached, a new screw, a dab of paint, right? Now’s the time. If you don’t have the materials, make a list. Order online, or shop, maintaining social distance and washing well afterward, if the store is open.

Big Deal. A break of weeks at home is also the time to undertake some projects that seem just too much for a weekend. Is this the time to tear out carpet, paint the bedroom, deep clean the car inside and out, build those movable shelves to hold the bins of fabric, camping gear, tools, or keepsakes? Yeah.

CREATE

Return to a Hobby. Or try a new one, accepting the learning curve. YouTube has videos, websites have tutorials, and if you have or can get the materials, you could be doing something that both makes something cool and brings you satisfaction and pride. There’s no limit to the possibilities here.

It’s Only Words. There’s time to write that story or get a start on the novel, try your hand at poetry, write up family history to pass on to relatives, or a zillion other projects that involve writing. Remember that whether anyone ever sees what you write is entirely your choice.

Adventures in the Kitchen. There are websites galore with new recipes for you to try, alone or with others. Find something that sounds good and give it a try.

Think of Others. While you’re at home bouncing off the walls in your eagerness to get out, don’t forget that within a few miles there are health care workers who haven’t had more than twelve hours off in weeks and live away from their families in fear of contagion, people unable to afford food for their kids, worried about Dad alone in another state, suffering increased symptoms from their mental illness, unable to get the drugs they need for serious health problems, sick with something that could be COVID-19 if there were enough tests to know for sure. Take a moment to be thankful all you are is stir-crazy, and to give to help others however you can.

Maryn Says

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